Thread (3 messages) 3 messages, 2 authors, 2024-06-16

Re: [PATCH] intro.1: Improve wording in initial introduction

From: Alejandro Colomar <alx@kernel.org>
Date: 2024-06-16 23:05:49

Hi Jeremy,

On Mon, Jun 17, 2024 at 10:29:17AM GMT, Jeremy Baxter wrote:
---
For readers of the list, this is a continuation of
<https://lore.kernel.org/linux-man/CZX4Y18EKIWK.1YLSFJIPJG2YA@disroot.org/ (local)>
quoted hunk ↗ jump to hunk
 man/man1/intro.1 | 31 +++++++++++++++++--------------
 1 file changed, 17 insertions(+), 14 deletions(-)
diff --git a/man/man1/intro.1 b/man/man1/intro.1
index decaab161..4d9e81c5a 100644
--- a/man/man1/intro.1
+++ b/man/man1/intro.1
@@ -10,9 +10,9 @@ Section 1 of the manual describes user commands and tools,
 for example, file manipulation tools, shells, compilers,
 web browsers, file and image viewers and editors, and so on.
 .SH NOTES
-Linux is a flavor of UNIX, and as a first approximation
-all user commands under UNIX work precisely the same under
-Linux (and FreeBSD and lots of other UNIX-like systems).
+Linux is a flavor of UNIX, and user commands under UNIX
+work similarly under Linux (and lots of other UNIX-like systems too,
+like FreeBSD).
I like the changes in this paragraph, except for the removal of "as a
first approximation".  Not a big deal, though.
quoted hunk ↗ jump to hunk
 .P
 Under Linux, there are GUIs (graphical user interfaces), where you
 can point and click and drag, and hopefully get work done without
@@ -20,15 +20,17 @@ first reading lots of documentation.
 The traditional UNIX environment
 is a CLI (command line interface), where you type commands to
 tell the computer what to do.
-That is faster and more powerful,
-but requires finding out what the commands are.
-Below a bare minimum, to get started.
+This is faster and more powerful,
+but requires finding out what the commands are and how to use them.
+Below is a bare minimum guide to get you started.
LGTM.
 .SS Login
-In order to start working, you probably first have to open a session by
-giving your username and password.
+In order to start working,
+you'll probably first have to open a session.
LGTM.
 The program
 .BR login (1)
-now starts a
+will wait for you to type your username and password,
+and after that,
+it will start a
 .I shell
 (command interpreter) for you.
LGTM.
quoted hunk ↗ jump to hunk
 In case of a graphical login, you get a screen with menus or icons
@@ -36,12 +38,13 @@ and a mouse click will start a shell in a window.
 See also
 .BR xterm (1).
 .SS The shell
-One types commands to the
+One types commands into the
 .IR shell ,
 the command interpreter.
LGTM.
-It is not built-in, but is just a program
-and you can change your shell.
-Everybody has their own favorite one.
+It is not built-in,
+but is just another program.
I would maybe use a ';'?

	It is not built-in;
	it is just another program.
+You can change your shell,
+and everybody has their own favorite one.
 The standard one is called
 .IR sh .
LGTM.
quoted hunk ↗ jump to hunk
 See also
@@ -53,7 +56,7 @@ See also
 .BR ksh (1),
 .BR zsh (1).
 .P
-A session might go like:
+A session might look like this:
LGTM.
 .P
 .in +4n
 .EX
-- 
2.45.2
I think I'll apply this patch.  Let me meditate it to-night.  I CCed
Doug, in case he has any comments (it would be great to hear his
feedback).

Have a lovely night!
Alex

-- 
<https://www.alejandro-colomar.es/>

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